Friday, May 29, 2009
was working on getting the bed frame set up this evening for a bit.. when I went to move the truck back to it's parking spot on the street, found out I have no dash lights at all... to dark out to go searching tonight, but that is a pain in the rump. gonna have to figure out where the problem is and see if I can chase it down for a repair..
have the wood for the bed frame, just have to be willing to get out there and do it!
I never expected to still be in the house this long.. I joked with some friends the other day that I'll just get on the road in time for it to turn cold.. and that is soo wrong! one of my aspirations was to get out of the summer heat.. but being the natural procrastinator that I am.. guess it shouldnt suprise me.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Added 5/29 Watched all 6 programs, very well done and gives me a new perspective on alot of Native American culture and some of the anger they still to this day feel for how American society has impacted thiers.
I could have put it in earlier and just used up floorspace, but I didnt like that answer, so worked out a system to put it Over the bike, with hinges so that I can flip it up when I need to load or unload the bike. picked up some screening so that I can have both rear doors open on the truck and keep the bugs out once I hit the wilds.. wish I was gone now! -grin-
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbow'd.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
current layout of the truck, and I think it's a keeper! will be building a bed over the Bike, so that I can still use that space as well. it feels quite roomy considerin :) this might just work.
Bikes in the drivers side rear of the box, on the passenger side are shelving units and a 48" desk. drivers side is just bike and shelves. Kayak stored over the shelves on passenger side.
Todays items to get finished!
get desk disassembled and in truck,(check)
Get shelving secured to the sidewalls of the truck,
Get a spray foam sealant for the holes that had been cut by prior owner,
Plan out how Kayak will be secured/set,(check)
Get hanging clothes rack in truck for spacial adjustments as needed(check)
items needed from Home Depot:
hardware to secure shelves,
hole filler/sealant, (check)
water repellant spray, didnt find what I wanted, sheeting will have to do.(check)
plastic sheeting. (check)
so let it be writtin, so let it be done!!
Saturday, May 9, 2009
it's not that I want to end it all and check out from this world, but a part of me doesn't see much point in continuing to fight. Ok, I can get through today, I know that.. Ok, I can get through tomorrow.. I know that too.. but when I look down the road, I dont see it improving.. in part I'm sure because I'm about to come head on in dealing with my fears and become mobile, turning my life upside down and having to shift it all. Part of me hopes that suddenly that will make me like life and want to play again, but most of me thinks thats a pretty tall order and it just isnt likely to happen at all.
I wish I knew the answer to the wonderfull question that has plauged me off and on for years "why bother to continue this life"? I'm not a christian, so I dont have a belief in Hell perse, I do believe that in some way I am responsible for how I have lived my life and that if I quit early I'll be missing out on some important things I was supposed to learn.. Or, do I know what I need to and checking out is simply my way to graduate? doubt there are any set rules on that one.. I dont want to bring pain into the lives of those folks I know and who care about me, but they cant fix the lack of desire to be here. That comes from the inside of course.
oh well, wont answer it tonight thats for sure, will try to get up early in the morning before it hits 90 and do a bit more on the truck I guess and try to keep my spirits moving forward.